When we last left you, Hurricane Irma had just handed Naples
a solid schoolyard beating, Mark was in a sling following shoulder surgery, and
our newest and fluffiest family member, Gatsby Fluff Face Royan, had just been
adopted.
Getting a puppy might not have been such a challenge had Hurricane Irma not handed us a concurrent down-to-the-studs remodel. That’s right, in the last 9 months we’ve moved, in one form or another, 4 times. To one side of our house, then to the other, then out completely, then back in.
At some point during this nonsense April lost her mind when
the only shower in the house collapsed on the same day that the kitchen and air
conditioner became unusable. Raising the white flag at the age of 38, she loaded
the kids into the minivan and moved back in with her parents. Mark and the dog
stayed behind and spent 8 lonely weeks on a mattress in the hot, dusty house …
streaming all 4 seasons of Bosch and each consuming their fair share of
take-out.
If you’ve never moved back in with your parents as an adult…
I highly recommend it. Sure, it’s
socially unacceptable and a sure sign of being a huge loser… but if you can do
it while holding down and job and promising that you do indeed have somewhere
else to go eventually, it’s not all that bad. Imagine a world where the people
who dropped you off at college 20 years ago now once again volunteer to do all
of your grocery shopping, cooking, cleaning and household tasks. Imagine coming
home after a long day at work to find a home cooked meal, your laundry done, and
your children freshly bathed and already exhausted from a swim in the perfectly
heated pool. Paradise, I tell you.
Doubling down on family time, we were even able to meet Aunt Amy at Disney World one weekend, during which she scored the impossible Pandora FastPass. God Bless America.
By the end of their 8 week stay, April’s parents were more than ready for her to move out and Mark was more than ready for his family to move back in. With only a week left in the remodel we celebrated the only way we know how… by traveling! Spring Break 2018 was spent on our very first, but certainly not our last, Disney Cruise!
Back in Naples, we settled into our new home just in time to
board it up for hurricane season and climb back into our trusty RV… ready for
the open road. Dog in tow and contractor on speed dial should anything burst in
our new walls while we’re gone, our first stop on this summer’s tour was of
course the most important, the end-of-year school play in Bonita Springs (7
miles from home).
Max, the cow, and Andrew, the prince, brought the house down
with their performances despite wardrobe malfunctions. The cow costume was cozy
but very hot, and the price costume was itchy and refused to fasten in the
back. 60 minutes later, costumes cast aside, we were on our way to Tampa.
A day at Dinosaur World with Mark’s dad, Ray, allowed the
kids and pup to go back in time as the Dads planned their upcoming hike on the
Appalachian Trail. April recalled that a large box had been delivered to the
house earlier in the month with the wording “MRE INCLUDED” among its stars and
stripes décor. A contractor working at
the house at the time commented that he sure hoped the Meals Ready to Eat were
not for us, because he’d never seen them voluntarily consumed by a civilian.
MREs and backpacks readied, we made our way to Dahlonega,
Georgia to set up “base camp” (April’s luxury living quarters) at the
questionable Etowah Campground.
Early on Saturday, June 9th, April
drove Mark, the boys, Ray and our nephew Hayden out into the wilderness and
left them there. While it seemed like the sort of punishment one might see in a
movie, the men were quite agreeable to being abandon. She and the pup then
spent the better part of the weekend shopping in quaint Dahlonega, eating
chocolate and watching the entire second season of Victoria while rain poured
down on the camper and the campground subsequently flooded. While walking the
dog through Georgia “muck” was no picnic, April imagined that Mark and the boys
were struggling with the rain in a far more challenging capacity than she was
somewhere on the mountain above her.
On Monday, June 11th, April once again drove up
the mountain, this time with Chick-fil-A in tow. She spotted the weary
travelers immediately as she arrived at the Walasi-Yi Interpretive Center, a
store and hostel along the Appalachian Trail. They were stinky and starving but
full of interesting stories of rattlesnakes, ticks, mountain storms, searches
for water and the unparalleled disgust of the MREs. Max noted that he was the
“Candy Man” on the trail, having smartly stuffed his cargo pants with chocolate
covered cherries back at the RV.
Everyone inhaled their Chick-fil-A as we drove back to Dahlonega to find
showers and a well-deserved dinner of pizza and chocolate milkshakes.
We rounded out our time in Georgia with a gold mine tour and piles of citronella-soaked laundry. Last but not least, a birthday celebration and a haircut for Gatsby as he celebrated his first year of life with an organic dog cookie that cost more than Mark's last birthday cake and was apparently laced with cocaine based on the subsequent doggie freak out. Next year he's getting a milk bone and some kibble and that will be that. Sorry not sorry, Gatsby.
Tomorrow we head North once again! Onward to the Carolinas!
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